Building Self Esteem by asking for what you want, the right way!
One way to instant self esteem is to start ‘acting as if’.
In other words, ‘pretending’ that you have high self esteem now - no matter what you think on the inside. But what to say? How to act? Here are some tips and techniques to learn how those with high confidence and high self esteem ask for what they want.
Here are some principles first:
- They ask assuming that the answer will be in the positive.
- They ask as many times as it takes to get their outcome.
- They ask in as many different ways as they can to get their outcome.
Now let’s look at some examples:
Low self confidence …
“I don’t suppose you can get the shoe size I am looking for?”
High self confidence …
“Can you get the shoe size I am looking for by tomorrow?” (Assumes size will be found somewhere; imposes deadline to create urgency)
Even higher self esteem …
“I’d like you to call me tomorrow when you have the shoe size I am looking for” (Also assumes a request will be fulfilled - contrast this with “Should I call in next week?”, which is far less powerful)
Here’s another example …
Low self confidence …
“The car seems a bit expensive … can you reduce the price?”
High self confidence …
“How much will you discount the car for me?”
Even higher self esteem …
“I’ll only be interested in the car when you show me a significant discount. When will you call me?”
Sometimes it takes a deep breath to say something like this that you wouldn’t normally say - and that’s great practice of course!
Of course you can ask yourself for what you want too … how about “Which day will I wake up feeling so much more confident … Thursday or Friday?”
You can learn tons of simple tips and techniques like these by signing up for my FREE building self esteem and self confidence techniques here.
All the best!
Robert
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